Parenting After Divorce: A Guide to Sharing Custody With Your Ex
Did you know that more than 45% of children in the United States will see their parents get divorced?
Divorce is always a challenging process to go through for all parties involved. The experience of divorce can be even more devastating to children. Often, when children learn of their parents getting a divorce, they blame it on themselves.
Except for extreme cases such as domestic abuse or substance addiction, it is important for parents going through a divorce to work together and help make the experience as least traumatic as possible for their children.
Continue to read to learn more about sharing custody and how divorced parents can co-parent together.
Initial Conversations Should Be Loving and Clear
Going through a divorce is a life-changing experience for children. When you talk to your children about a divorce, it is crucial that you make it clear that the children did not cause the divorce.
You will need to express that you and your spouse have drifted apart and are no longer compatible. Children should know from the beginning that your divorce will not affect their relationships with both you and your spouse.
During initial conversations, you will have to prepare your children for a new life. In most cases, you and your spouse will no longer be living together under the same roof.
This can cause a lot of emotions for children and they will need time to get adjusted. You can remind them that this unfortunate circumstance is in the best interest of the family. Mom and dad can better parent apart than together.
If both you and your ex are emotionally prepared enough, you can discuss an early shared custody plan and then explain it to your children. Legal assistance can also be helpful in determining a long-term shared custody strategy if there are disagreements.
Children Benefit From Strong Relationships with Both Parents
When parents can collaborate together and put the best interest of their children first, this can allow their children to thrive even in such an unpleasant situation.
In many cases, children have equal relationships with both their parents. A divorce does not have to compromise this. Children benefit from maintaining strong relationships with both parents.
Co-parenting after divorce can be difficult, but it is worth it in the end if both you and your ex are committed. It creates an entirely new kind of relationship. One that is not about you, but strictly about your children.
For successful co-parenting, parents have to recognize that they are on the same team and need to work together to give their children the best possible experience. When children can feel love from both their parents, they will be more confident, secure, and happy.
One of the most important things to remember is to refrain from talking negatively about your spouse/ex. This can confuse your children and may make them feel different about their other parent. In turn, this could make them get further emotional or angry.
Learn More About Sharing Custody Today
Going through a divorce is never an easy process, but it does not have to be traumatizing for your children. Many couples co-parent with great success and their children have grown up to be happy and strong adults.
The most important thing to remember is that your children want life to be as similar as possible and want to have both of their parents in their lives. Sharing custody can be a great positive.
At Crosson Richettti & Daigle, we help families every day with shared custody plans. Our team supports soon-to-be-divorced parents and assists them in developing the best possible solution for their children.
To learn more about our team and how we can be of service to you, please contact us today.